I was just drifting off in class today... (sad as I was teaching... oooof... actually I was on break... yea... thats it...break)
And I thought solemnly... If I were a finger...
Would I be the workhorse of the hand... the Thumb... in all its splendour and glory it gave us the power to evolve from amoebas (as we were the only amoebas that had thumbs)... The grand Thumb that is cool enough to have a silent letter at the end of its name that has piss all to do with the pronunciation of its name... In fact I think I will officially change my name to Samuelb I thought to myself... then I could properly pay homage to the grandest finger of them all...
But then I thought of the petite super model of the gang... the Pinkie. How misunderstood the most beautiful and slender finger of them all. Its beauty is always taken for granted. It is by far the most posh of the lot as seen during tea drinking (always poised and unassuming). Thats it... I would be Posh Pinkie. And I would often plate myself in gold so that others in the room would sit up and take notice when I raised my head...
Then I thought to myself... no I want power, to have respect, control... thats when I realised I wanted to be the Pointer. Thats right the CEO of the hand. I could make countries shake by my power to push the button, I could make kids grow up mall adjusted from the terror of my trembling nag. I could make it happen for you...
But then I thought... I want respect, not fear... So I would be the Mr. T of the lot... The ring finger. The true finger that is the model for all other fingers to follow. The one adorned with gold, silver, and platinum, the finger I most often demo on as it is the finger I most want to be... Thats it then... the ring finger would be me...
Then I suddenly thought... to hell with it... Ill be Jacks Screaming Rage... the Driving finger.
Toooooooooodles