What's the weirdest thing you heard from the other side of the table?

[jade_m_b]

Oh I forgot about this one, I had a lovely middle aged woman in who suffered with ms, so we had to go to the spa via a lift through the main hotel as only one of our rooms is wheelchair accesable, so we get up there and when I asked her about undressing I'd said did she need a hand or me holding her up whilst she undressed etc or did she just want me to leave, she just took her time balanced on me and got on the bed with some help, when she was on the bed I had to pull her swimsuit down and at the end of the treatment I forgot I had simply just pulled it down as if it was a pair of knickers, so I said I'll just pull it back up for u, well I couldn't seem to find the straps to pull so. I thought I must of got it stuck inside so I'm pulling and pulling were both laughing and I said I'm sorry I cnt find the arms, when I realised I had actually given her the biggestwedgie ever! So I apologised without trying to laugh and my instant reaction was to pull her wedgie out! So as I'm pulling one side out I realised what I
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[jade_m_b]

* was actually doing and just muttered you might wanna get the other side. The poor poor woman!

Oh I forgot about this one, I had a lovely middle aged woman in who suffered with ms, so we had to go to the spa via a lift through the main hotel as only one of our rooms is wheelchair accesable, so we get up there and when I asked her about undressing I'd said did she need a hand or me holding her up whilst she undressed etc or did she just want me to leave, she just took her time balanced on me and got on the bed with some help, when she was on the bed I had to pull her swimsuit down and at the end of the treatment I forgot I had simply just pulled it down as if it was a pair of knickers, so I said I'll just pull it back up for u, well I couldn't seem to find the straps to pull so. I thought I must of got it stuck inside so I'm pulling and pulling were both laughing and I said I'm sorry I cnt find the arms, when I realised I had actually given her the biggestwedgie ever! So I apologised without trying to laugh and my instant reaction was to pull her wedgie out! So as I'm pulling one side out I realised what I
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[AllThumbs]

i can't believe this thread is still going! fabulous! i'm loving the stories ladies!

 

[Thompson24]

and. gents lol.

 

[tigi]

A guy came into the salon to pay for his girlfriends treatments, nice i thought, how sweet of him. She came in the next day, had her treatments and then said

" you wont tell my husband that my boyfriend paid for my treatments will you?".

 

[St311ar]

I had a lady come in who used to be a domanatrix for 15 years and still had a few clients. She told me one guy who was a teacher at a highchool liked getting his testicles injected with saline so that they swelled to the size of a grapefruit. She said they stayed that big for days!

 

[Bonkers]

Oh ladies you have made my day so much brighter! I have laughed so loud between clients we have builders in refurbing and I think they think im a mad woman x

 

[simsarahlou]

years back i had a lady for a pedicure who seemed very nervous and was texting away on her phone. hadnt said much to me then came out with
'i dont know what to do my husband is throwing my clothes out of the house and wants me to leave coz he thinks in having an affair with our neighbour, what should i do?'
all this was happening at the time of her pedicure but she wanted me to carry on so i did.
now im not in the habit of giving out advice especially to clients but she just would stop asking me what to do and was welling up a bit. so i said to her 'im sure he will believe you, just tell him the truth thats all you can do. why does he think your having an affair?'
'the neighbour told him'
'why would he make that up' i said
and she said, 'well i am having an affair with him. so what shall i do?''
hello? why do people think we are marrige guidance people?
and if your marrige is in shambles and your clothes are being thrown out onto the street are you content with having a pedicure?

we had a regular girl who came in for waxing who occasionally would come in drunk and insist we did the treatment anyway dispite the fact that she was wasted.

another girl who was drunk everytime she came in (pub nearby) to have treatments in preperation for her big wedding day who would then talk about her boyfriend (another man not the fiance)and get him to pick her up and stuff from her appointment.

another girl who insisted on taking of her knickers to have a bikini line wax, she only ever had the tinyist bit taken off the sides so i always said it again each time she was in, take off her trousers she can leave her knickers on that would be fine. so you leave for her to change, come back in to a kickerless woman who was not shy at all. so for modesty i would place a towel over her and covering the legs to also keep her warm as it was winter and she would throw it off onto the floor and say, thats in your way isnt it? everytime!

 

[Nail.addict]

What a fab thread! Just spent half an hour reading all these and I cannot stop laughing! Feel for some of you girlie's though, they sound like horror stories hehe

xxxs

 

[divadee]

Bless her b4 my mun passed i would hive her facials but she would fall asleep so i would carry on regardless still asleep when id finished so id put away she woke up after a good snooze and ask wheres my treatment then tell me i hadnt finished it bless her

 

[blush09]

when i was a mua ..

a bride having blazing row with her mum after she was making mean comments about the flowers, the bridesmaids dresses, moaning she wasnt going in the bridesmaids car etc .. bride was cool as a cucumber throughout all her complaining then just as i finished her makeup she sprung out of the chair and completely lost it with her, telling her she should be supporting her on her wedding day, could she not leave off complaining for just one day (i was secretly thinking yay .. you go girl, her mum WAS a nightmare) the mum didnt seem phased at all and simply said "i dont want to be at your stupid wedding anyway, its always got to be about you hast it!" then called a cab home, lol

another bride texting her boyfriend (not fella she was about to marry) to make arrangements when/where to meet when came off honeymoon her siter and friend (bridesmaids) were in the room too!

the bride and her bridesmaid slagging off another bridesmaid when she went out the room for a moment, the bride said "i had to ask her to be my bridesmaid as would have been hell to pay, but she's gonna completely ruin my photos" other bridesmaid replied "perhaps you can get her airbrushed out" i was completely mortified, felt so sorry for her when she came back in the room :-(

 

[Envy]

ok, well this isn't actually my story, but one a student told me...

"Student applies beautiful set of pink and white nails at the end realises they seem to appear kind of frosted....
Starts to file and shape and they completely disintergrate and crumble apart, coming completely off, leaving the perfectly prepped nail clean as a whistle..."

Moral of the story... Make sure you have put monomer in your dappen dish and not product remover....

Upon being questioned about not noticing the difference in colour, student replies, I didn't think it looked right, but was so nervous I didn't want to look like I didn't know what I was doing... (well, that worked out well then...)

 

[AllThumbs]

Wow i Cant believe its been a year since i started this thread. Ive had lots of new weirdos at my table since then!
My fave are my drug dealing lesbians. I just found out last week that they bought a new strap on adult toy for the first time. She even told me its "name". Rofl...i think i know more about their sex life than i do about my own!
And somehow all their crazy lesbian drug dealing friends are now my clients too..... Lol i think i have a sign on my head that says " i do crazy ppls nails"

 

[Gawjus36]

This thread is absolutely FABTASTIC!!! I don't have much in the way of experience with lots of clients, but one of my first appointments still repulses me now!
I am a mobile nail tech and I went to see a client one evening to do her a set of L&P's. I had been to her house the previous week to do her teenage daughter's nails and was aware of the large number of animals in and around the house - dogs, cats, hamsters, guinea pigs, fish, and goodness only knows what else! Oh and three kids - the youngest of which was 3yrs old.
So I am sat doing the set of nails with a small child and several animals running loose and I have left the monomer uncovered to help me cope with the smell of the animals!
All of a sudden I could smell dog poo and commented that the dog must have terrible wind.....that was until I noticed that the young child had disturbed a pile of dog poo on the carpet and was treading it in all over the place IN HIS BARE FEET AND PJ'S!!! :suprised:
Oh, how I wasn't sick I will never know, and it took me forever to complete the set, although I was very focused on getting it done quickly. In the meantime I felt something crawling on my neck and found I had been bitten by a flea the following day. :irked:

Thankfully she has not called me back for any further appointments - not happy to lose a customer but relieved to not have to return to those conditions!! :lol:

 

[AllThumbs]

Oh my gosh! That reminds me of a client of mine who used a woman who did braiding from her house. My client said the place was crawling with trash and kids. So filthy.

 

[nikkisbeauty]

Mine aren't too bad thankfully but I did have one client that came regularly and she had recently been in a car accident and hurt her foot so I'm doing her infills and she says do you mind if I take my shoe off to ease my foot so I said it's fine her feet didn't look the nicest but I wasn't doin them so not too worried and we carried on then after a little bit she started picking off bits of hard skin and bits if muck from under her nail so gross !!! Of course I had to politely explain that we need to keep her hands clean and sanitised !!!

 

[blush09]

well, if we're talkig poos .. cpl weeks ago i went so a clients to do minx, just got set up and decided thought better spend a penny as didnt want to have to go half way through - i asked if i could used the loo and the woman replied "its just by the door love, ignore the floater .. im waiting for the other half to get in from work to sort it out" i just went in the hallway and hovered about , no way was i going anywhere near her toilet - was busting by the time i finished, lol

 

[Divine Diva]

I once had a male client for a full body massage, while doing the treatment I realised he was naked!

He kept trying to talk about sex and porn, which I would not discuss. He refused to turn over after I had completed the front of his body. Instead he whipped his towel off and said, "We don't need that." I grabbed the towel, through it over his crotch and said "Yes we do, either turn over so I can finish or get dressed!" He refused so I quickly left the room and waited in reception!
:Grope:

He seemed to have confused a beauty salon and a brothel type massage parlour. :smack:

He kept ringing up every other day to try to get an appointment and I kept saying we were fully booked!

I left the salon not long after that, it wasn't related to that incident but I was relieved. I worked a few late nights on my own, which made me a bit uncomfortable in case he came by.

 

[heatherp]

When I was doing my Level 3 in college I was doing an aromatherapy massage assessment on an outside client who had booked in.

Well I should be flattered becaused she enjoyed the massage so much she fell into a deep sleep and starting snooring soooo loud. You wouldn't believe the noise and I just didnt know what to do, all the other students started to snigger and laugh as we were only seperated by curtains and I was worried that it would affect some of the others who were also doing assessments.
I tried a couple of slightly more vigourous movements but nothing worked and at the end when I gave her a little pat to say there was water for her, she got up, dressed, thanked me, gave me a glowing comment on my form and left completely unaware of the commotion that had gone on!!!

 

[linzi]

I don't have any great stories. Just the usual sanitary pads and bikini waxes and stuff, but OMG your stories have had me in stitches. I actually have a sore belly from laughing :lol::lol:

i had a woman vomit all over my nail desk while i was actually doing her nails !, then collapse onto it , shock horror ! i was just about to call an ambulance in a mad panic when she came round and said " im fine now, can you finish my nails" ehhhhhh no. i dont think so.

Good Lord, she'd have needed the ambulance anyway if she'd vomited all over me :o:o