When to say "I love you"?

[marioned]

Hi all,
I've been going out with my BF for about 7 weeks now and I am in love! :Kissing: :Love: He's just such a lovely person, so gentle and caring, but manly.
I'm 48 and haven't been out with anyone for any length of time since I got divorced 15 years ago, so I'm at a loss about what to do. Feel like a teenager again!
I don't know how he feels about me and don't want to scare him off. How should I approach this, or should I just leave things as they are at the moment?:Scared:
I'd appreciate any advice from anyone more knowledgeable about dating than me!
Thanks!
Marion

 

[Tsia]

these situations are tricky.. just say it! LOL

I said it first around the 2 and a half month mark.. and when I did there was a long pause (ok not that long) but I thought he wasnt going to say it back, and for a split second I thought "oh no, what have I done? Put my foot in it"
..then he did say it back. The longest 5 seconds of MY LIFE!!!!

He later said he just wanted to make me squirm. :o

 

[weezie]

You could always say jokingy "I could really fall for you!!" or something similar but less cheesy and see what he says. On the other hand if he really likes you too he could only be flattered by those amazing 3 words whether he feels it too or not yet. :Love: some guys don't say it first as they assume you know by their behaviour.

 

[marioned]

Thing is, he's not been out with ANYONE since he got divorced 15 years ago. Worried it might be too much for him! So out of practise I can't read the signals! LOL

 

[Teri]

Hi all,
I've been going out with my BF for about 7 weeks now and I am in love! :Kissing: :Love: He's just such a lovely person, so gentle and caring, but manly.
I'm 48 and haven't been out with anyone for any length of time since I got divorced 15 years ago, so I'm at a loss about what to do. Feel like a teenager again!
I don't know how he feels about me and don't want to scare him off. How should I approach this, or should I just leave things as they are at the moment?:Scared:
I'd appreciate any advice from anyone more knowledgeable about dating than me!
Thanks!
Marion

I had been with my partner about 3/4 months when I told him that I loved him. It was at a deli counter in a lovely place called Alfriston (day out together). I was absolutely mortified that I had said it thinking what if he didn't feel the same way.

He didn't tell me back straight away but just smiled at me and told me not to feel stupid for saying it.

We have been together 7 years in Jan and tell each other all the time now.

If it feels right, go for it!

Teri x:Love: :Love:

 

[Glorsclaws]

If youre having a ball and njoying each other, why do you want to change anything?
I wouldnt say anything at all tbh, if he is starting to/feeling the same way, it will tumble out from one of your mouths sooner or later but in the meantime I wouldnt try & rush things, 7 weeks isnt that long.
A wise woman once told me that this is the 'best bit of a relationship, dont force it' and I found it to be true.
Stay happy!

 

[marioned]

..then he did say it back. The longest 5 seconds of MY LIFE!!!!

He later said he just wanted to make me squirm. :o

LOL Think he must have a wicked streak!!!

 

[weezie]

Thing is, he's not been out with ANYONE since he got divorced 15 years ago. Worried it might be too much for him! So out of practise I can't read the signals! LOL

Everyone is so different in or out of practice men or women, some of my female friends would feak out after being told that after 7 weeks and others would love it. If you feel it you could try saying "There is something I want to say to you about my feeling but I'm worried you may think it is too soon. It's o.k if you do not feel the same, but should I tell you?"

I did this with an ex and he said "there is something I want to tell you too" this went on with us saying "you say it first" it was a nice moment when one of us finally told the other :Love:

I can understand you wanting confirmation of his feelings you could always start with "I really like you" x

 

[CadenceAlex]

I'd keep schtum, if love is for real it develops without being said - without NEEDING to be said - wait until New Years Eve or something at least. Gives u time to fall in love that little bit longer without possibly seeming clingy (not saying you are, but some men will love to be told.. others will change their mobile number)

But I'm glad you are happy, the beginning of a new relationship is wonderful... :Love:

 

[marioned]

Thanks everyone for all your advice. Think I'll wait a little longer and then go down the "I really like you" road. I so want this to work out, I don't want to jeopardise it by rushing things.
Hugs to you all.

 

[CadenceAlex]

Thanks everyone for all your advice. Think I'll wait a little longer and then go down the "I really like you" road. I so want this to work out, I don't want to jeopardise it by rushing things.
Hugs to you all.

Good Luck and enjoy the warm fuzzy feeling... it soon wears off when you're turning their stinking socks inside out... :o

 

[marioned]

Good Luck and enjoy the warm fuzzy feeling... it soon wears off when you're turning their stinking socks inside out... :o

LOL :Love: Way I feel right now I'd even love to do this!!

 

[CadenceAlex]

LOL :Love: Way I feel right now I'd even love to do this!!

Aww that's lovely!!! I'm just bitter because I've been doing it all day and filled FOUR washing baskets with washing, which my grandad kindly picked me up from Asda this afternoon because he saw me struggling! Great new storage system for me!!!

I know how you feel though, when I first met him I loved doing his washing and ironing and making sure he looked smart and was well looked after... it's a nice feeling!

 

[marioned]

I'm just bitter because I've been doing it all day and filled FOUR washing baskets with washing

Aww poor you. Will give you a feeling of relief when it's all done at least!

I know how you feel though, when I first met him I loved doing his washing and ironing and making sure he looked smart and was well looked after... it's a nice feeling!

Didn't say anything about ironing!!!!! I don't do ironing!

 

[linzwee]

god i'm so jealous! i want to love someone...booohoooo!

 

[marioned]

If you wait long enough Linzie.....admittedly 15 years each for us is a long time!!!!

Just checked your profile and realised you were 10 years old when I got divorced!

 

[linzwee]

i know.. its sounds lovely that your so loved up! wishing u all the happiness xx

 

[xtremities]

Hi there.

I think you should say it "when you really feel it".

What have you got to lose. We only have one life and spontaneity is so much more appealing than planning to say those three magic words.

 

[HappyHands]

my hubby and i refused to say those "three little words" so we settled for the saying "tlw" which means three little words.. we have always said it written it and know that its a private saying.. hth.. find you own little saying.. explain to him you are falling for him in a big way but you dont want to scare him of with "those words" but you want him to know how you feel. it will all fall into place hun i promise:Love::Love:

 

[Noodle]

When to say "I love you", is when you're good and ready. I don't think it's something you can rehearse either ... it will happen when you least expect it and will most probably be completely spontaneous.

Good luck hun.