Sorry to hear that you didn't receive all the aftercare you feel you need from your stylist!
Here's a list I found blissfulhairextensions, it's a thorough list of how to look after your extensions and make the most out of them:
Washing
Once your extensions have been fitted it is recommended you do not wash them for at least 48 hours. This gives the extensions a chance to sit and fall naturally on your head and own hair. After 48 hours you are free to wash them if you wish but be cautious not to put any shampoo or conditioner near the bonds.
Always brush your hair and detangle thoroughly before you begin to wash it.
The best way to wash your hair when you have had extensions added is to wash the top of your head/scalp as you normally would but in a slower and gentler motion. Then smooth the existing shampoo down the hair rubbing gently with your hands to ensure it gets washed properly.
When adding your conditioner you do not want to rub this into your scalp like you would have with the shampoo. Simply rub onto hands and smooth down your hair starting from your roots and working it all the way down to the ends but avoiding the bonds/micro rings attaching the hair extensions. This is just to prevent the bonds from getting greasy and either slipping down your hair and coming out or building residue underneath the micro rings causing this later on. You can then get a comb, and with one hand holding the hair from where the extension/bond has been fitted, use the other to gently brush the conditioner through your hair to detangle and ensure the conditioner has gone through all the hair.
Drying
When drying your hair off with a towel do not rub hair vigorously as this will only cause it to tangle, simply dab or squeeze your hair dry with the towel.
If using a blow dryer it is recommended that you dont use it on the hottest heat setting, this is to just reduce any chance of melting the bond or causing damage to your natural hair. However it is important that where the hair extension is attached this does not get left wet or damp as it will cause the bond to become more vulnerable and at risk of breakage.
Heat Appliances
If you always use heat appliances after washing your hair such as a blow dryer, straighteners or curling tongs, try not to wash your hair more than twice a week. In theory you can wash your hair as often as you like but the less stress you put on your hair and the extension hair the better as the less drying, straightening or curling you have to do through heat every time after washing it the better.
You can use any heat appliance you would normally use on your own hair. All you have to remember is to be careful not to get them to close or in contact with the bond as this could melt it. With the Micro Ring method this cannot happen as the metal ring that is clamped over your hair and the extension hair cannot melt. However putting straightners over the metal ring too often could cause it to slip down your hair and result in it falling out.
Try to use shampoos, conditioners and aftercare products that have been recommended for hair extensions only. Normal high street brands can contain silicone based ingredients or high alcohol levels which can cause bonds to weaken and dry out the hair causing it to become very dry and coarse. Putting a leave in conditioner in is good for the hair extensions as they will still need to be given nutrients and vitamins just like your own hair. A protector spray is also strongly advised to prevent heat damage to your own hair which can cause breakage with or without hair extensions. Ask your technician what brand of products they would recommend.
Brushing
It is strongly recommended that you buy a soft bristle brush or a tangle teaser as these types of brushes will cause minimal damage to your extensions. Hard bristled brushes and brushes with balls on the end of bristles can tug on the bonds and sometimes pull the bond and hair out.
You will lose strands of your own hair shedding whilst brushing, however this is normal taking into account an average person will naturally shred 100 hairs a days so do not feel alarmed when it looks like a lot of hair is coming off your brush. This happens by the bond or micro ring still being attached or gripped to the dead hair and it only becomes free from your hair when it has been pulled away by the brush rather than over a gradual period of time.
Brush your extensions at least once a day but no more than 3 times a day as if you brush it too much this can cause unnecessary shedding and pulling of the bonds.
When brushing with a soft bristle brush or tangle teaser you should brush gently from the root to get rid of natural hair shredding. If this is not done the natural hair that shreds will build up and could cause matting later on. With micro rings unlike glue they are easier to brush over, therefore they dont get stuck or attached to the brush, they merely just brush over the metal surface. At the beginning of having extensions fitted you may want to use the same method you would have used in applying the conditioner. Hold one hand at the root of your hair and brush your hair with the other until you have got the hang of doing it naturally.
Never leave your hair extensions wet after washing and not brush them as this can cause them to get extremely matted and tangled. In some cases the hair extensions have to be removed and a new set has to be installed where the extensions have been left to dry but have not been brushed.
Before going to bed it is better to either leave your hair tied loose in a pony tail or plaited to prevent tangling & minimizing knots during sleep.
Colouring
If you dye your natural hair colour you can still keep having your t section or roots done during the duration you wear the extensions.
You can dye all of your hair if you wish whilst wearing hair extensions but you would need to have a strand test done before hand on your own hair and the extension hair as they may colour different. This is because the extension hair is a different type of hair to your own and may not dye the same shade because of this. However if you are getting the extensions removed shortly afterwards it is advisable to wait as you do not want a different shade of color left on your hair where the extension was attached if you are not getting extensions reapplied.
If you just wanted to have some more colours put in your hair whilst you have your extensions in, you can always have some of your extensions removed and replaced with different colors rather than to chemically dye your hair. Most technicians will offer this service and do this for you at your maintance appointment if you request this, some technicians may add on an extra charge for this service on top of the maitanance charge. However this is not unusual and this will be cheaper or the same price as going to a salon and having it coloured.
General Maintenance
Depending on the hair extension method you have decided to use, hair extensions in general can normally be worn up to 3 months maximum. Some people will wear them for longer, however it can cause your own hair to become damaged. Not only that but hair tends to grow on average half an inch a month so by 3 months your hair has grown an inch and a half. In turn this can leave tiny knots in the root of your hair to however far the bond of the extension has moved down due to the hair growth This is because of the natural shredding process combined with natural hair growth, together these can cause matting between the root area of your hair and where the extension has been fitted. The bonds are also likely to now be more noticible.
With Micro Rings some technicians say you can leave them in for up to 4 months however this will be different for everyone. It all depends on how quick your hair grows, how you have treated the hair and if you have had any maintenance appointments to move the micro rings back up towards the root in this time. We would recommend not leaving them in for any longer than 3 months.
With most extension methods you will need to spend some time separating the bonds after wearing them for so long. As your hair grows alongside the extensions your hair will naturally be shedding (dead hair that you lose from your scalp) and this can sometimes cause the hair extensions to get stuck next to each other. Therefore after wearing extensions for a few weeks you should then start to check them every few days until you feel that you are having to pull them away from each other as they feel stuck at the root. You should do this by slowly pulling one away from the other. This prevnts them from becoming matted and allows them to be removed later on without causing any stress to your own natural hair. You will not need to do this so much with micro rings as no glue or chemicals have been used so they dont stick together as much as other methods.
There is no activity, sport or hobby you cant do with hair extensions. But you will need to follow a different regime to how you would treat your own hair in order to keep them looking as good and has healthy as possible.
Swimming -
Always brush your hair before swimming and then tie it back in a tight ponytail or a plait to prevent knotting and tangling.
Always wash your hair straight after swimming, the chemical chloride that they put in swimming pools can dry out the hair and cause matting. This goes for your own hair, not only does it dry it out and make it brittle but in some cases can cause it too change colour.
After washing your hair put a leave in spray conditioner if possible, this is just to restore the condition of your hair it may have lost after swimming.
If you are swimming in the ocean try and avoid getting the hair in the salt water if you can. Salt water strips the hair of moisture more than chlorine does and can make it become very tangled. If this isnt possible braid your hair very tightly back or wear your hair in a very high pony tail.
Active Sports
Any sport or activity that causes you to sweat; such as gym, outdoor activities, sunbeds, saunas or steam rooms, you will need to take a few safety measures.
The same procedure follows as with swimming; brush your hair firstly, tie your hair up or plait it if possible.
If your hair gets wet from excessive sweating you MUST wash it straight away afterwards, this is to prevent the bonds from slipping down your hair. With activities that have caused sweating if you also wear a headband as well as tying it back this will help to prevent the sweat reaching the hair, so you are less likely to wont have to wash it afterwards.
Hth!