Teenagers!

[virtues2011]

Love this thread. ..Empress Debbie beats us all on the patience front with children I have to say! Are your records still being used as Frisbees? Ha ha that still makes me laugh. .

Victoriabar- no child dropping off please unless you don't mind them being left alone for hours at a time. .. in the forest! . Don't forget our coffee!!

Winnie (lovely lady) this thread is not for you. ..ha ha

To the rest of you. ... best of luck, may we all come out alive at the end! .... Or more to the point. ... our children.



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[Victoriabar]

Love this thread. ..Empress Debbie beats us all on the patience front with children I have to say! Are your records still being used as Frisbees? Ha ha that still makes me laugh. .

Victoriabar- no child dropping off please unless you don't mind them being left alone for hours at a time. .. in the forest! . Don't forget our coffee!!

Winnie (lovely lady) this thread is not for you. ..ha ha

To the rest of you. ... best of luck, may we all come out alive at the end! .... Or more to the point. ... our children.



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Yes Empress Debbie must have the patience of a severely patient person

Did I mention she likes horses?? No poss not, maybe I'll not drop her off then haha
This week is a wash out with both kids being rudely Ill, how dare they interfere with my socialising but I've decided I'm stopping off at Greg's and bringing cake, let me know what you like

Winnie I think you are missing out, let us allow you the luxury of a week with each of our brood.... You get to experience girls (over a long time) and we each get a week off them



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[w1nnie]

Yes Empress Debbie must have the patience of a severely patient person

Did I mention she likes horses?? No poss not, maybe I'll not drop her off then haha
This week is a wash out with both kids being rudely Ill, how dare they interfere with my socialising but I've decided I'm stopping off at Greg's and bringing cake, let me know what you like

Winnie I think you are missing out, let us allow you the luxury of a week with each of our brood.... You get to experience girls (over a long time) and we each get a week off them



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Err, no thanks, ..lol you seem to have her wrapped ! !! Got her sorted :green:

 

[lila22]

It's good to no we are all in the same boat!
Some have been there done that and survived others have it to come and like me some are in the storm of it!
All this chatting and hearing other stories has helped so thanks ladies 😘xx

 

[Empress Debbie]

Love this thread. ..Empress Debbie beats us all on the patience front with children I have to say! Are your records still being used as Frisbees? Ha ha that still makes me laugh. .

Victoriabar- no child dropping off please unless you don't mind them being left alone for hours at a time. .. in the forest! . Don't forget our coffee!!

Winnie (lovely lady) this thread is not for you. ..ha ha

To the rest of you. ... best of luck, may we all come out alive at the end! .... Or more to the point. ... our children.



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Yep, records still flying around everywhere.......

 

[Elaine143a]

Please don't all hate me lol and sorry for long post!

I never had a problem with my three as teenagers now 24, 22 and 20 (except for the odd school issue)! I actually loved their teenage years - they were sooo energetic, full of life, had mad future plans, hilariously funny, brilliant mates (that I sometimes nurtured lol) etc ...........

My secret? I haven't got one unfortunately! BUT I was very strict with them as toddlers, children and youngsters (which I found much harder than teenage years!) Maybe they learnt from that? When they hit the teenage years, I remembered how I felt at that age. What did I crave most during that time? SPACE!!!!!!!! On the odd occasions they would strop off to their rooms after I'd told them something they didn't want to hear, did I go after them? NO! Leave them alone to reflect, and they will calm down!

Very importantly, remember that their behaviour will affect your behaviour, and your behaviour will affect their response! So when they're kicking off (as they will, because of hormones), remain calm! Even if this means ignoring them, or not responding! If you react in an angry way, they will respond in an angry way, which in turn will make you shout back, and they will respond aggresssively .................... and the circle goes full turn until it's WW3!

hth someone going thro tough times xxxx

 

[tonicj]

You're going to hate me too Geeks! I am with W1nnie and Elaine! I can honestly say that the only problem I had now and again were slightly untidy bedrooms and at one point couldn't get my son to get a job. That only lasted for a short time though. They both have good jobs now and work very very hard and I am proud of them both. They have always been well mannered and still say their "excuse me, please and thank yous!" We talk about everything and are very close. We go shopping together, have coffee together, go for walks together. I know it probably sounds cringy, but that's how it is. Their dad and I divorced when they were around 6 and 5 years old, but always remained throughout that difficult period very respectful towards each other. When we both had the kids, neither of us would ever say a bad word to them about the other and the kids grew up in a very stable and much loved environment. I probably don't belong to this thread either, but don't give up on them. I'm sure most of them will find their way in their own time xx

 

[waffle4]

You're going to hate me too Geeks! I am with W1nnie and Elaine! I can honestly say that the only problem I had now and again were slightly untidy bedrooms and at one point couldn't get my son to get a job. That only lasted for a short time though. They both have good jobs now and work very very hard and I am proud of them both. They have always been well mannered and still say their "excuse me, please and thank yous!" We talk about everything and are very close. We go shopping together, have coffee together, go for walks together. I know it probably sounds cringy, but that's how it is. Their dad and I divorced when they were around 6 and 5 years old, but always remained throughout that difficult period very respectful towards each other. When we both had the kids, neither of us would ever say a bad word to them about the other and the kids grew up in a very stable and much loved environment. I probably don't belong to this thread either, but don't give up on them. I'm sure most of them will find their way in their own time xx

It's not a case of "giving up on them" but what about us poor mums at the end of our tether and being upset and shouted at (sometimes over the most petty things aswell!)??

My daughter is well mannered, polite, kind and to outsiders probably looks like butter wouldn't melt but my god she can gob off at me. It certainly wasn't that she had a bad upbringing coz she didn't.

 

[virtues2011]

It's not a case of "giving up on them" but what about us poor mums at the end of our tether and being upset and shouted at (sometimes over the most petty things aswell!)??

My daughter is well mannered, polite, kind and to outsiders probably looks like butter wouldn't melt but my god she can gob off at me. It certainly wasn't that she had a bad upbringing coz she didn't.

I've given up on mine at the moment. I'm not sure that hurts them either. "You want to try and be an adult and survive on your own. Good luck to you.... it's harder than you think. ...." that's what I said as I shut the door behind her...

Tonicj was just trying to say be patient they will come through it. ...

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[Victoriabar]

It's not a case of "giving up on them" but what about us poor mums at the end of our tether and being upset and shouted at (sometimes over the most petty things aswell!)??

My daughter is well mannered, polite, kind and to outsiders probably looks like butter wouldn't melt but my god she can gob off at me. It certainly wasn't that she had a bad upbringing coz she didn't.

Here here, my daughter can be ever as lovely as all the ladies aboves children BUT she has a huge hormonal side too.

I know my kids haven't had a bad upbringing, they've had a finantially poor one but my older two are both amazing parents and they tell me its due to my parenting them so well, my eldest has done so many years in college as full time student doing also evening courses to enable her to get to uni next year to train as a sociology teacher.
My son spend 3yrs in college, then 3yrs being a stay at home dad to enable his gf to go to college and now he is back in college training to become a policeman.
My 16yro is a model high achieving student with outstanding impeccable manners in behaviour, shes just given up elite gymnastics where she got to international competing level before deciding she wanted to concentrate totally on school work, elite behaviour in the gymnastic environment.

They are all individuals who need to outlet that hormonal surge.
As the saying goes 'we always hurt the ones closest to us' its up to us as adults to TRY and walk away from the often provoking teen who wants to let rip for often no reason that they understand themselves.

To be fair, and I'm not being mean BUT unless you've lived with the HORROR teen years you just won't understand it.

I never had the terrible twos, trying threes, feisty fours or anything from my first two kids, placid as you like, I used to laugh at friends going through it thinking awww my kids are fab... Well you know what, my next two were fab too, just in a more demanding, challenging and often more fullfilling but always more knackering way
The 4th is just 5 so still there.

I'm now loving watching my grandkids hitting those stages and often hear "it's ok we can do this, we know what Scarlett was like at this age"
Hahaha.
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[waffle4]

Virtues,
But how would she know when by all accounts she's got the Brady bunch at home?! I'm sorry, I know she's your mate, but a smug post like that is hardly gonna help us mums stressing out over our teenagers

 

[virtues2011]

Virtues,
But how would she know when by all accounts she's got the Brady bunch at home?! I'm sorry, I know she's your mate, but a smug post like that is hardly gonna help us mums stressing out over our teenagers

Aaahhh Waffle4. ..I know how tonicj writes her comments, she has no bad or unhelpful bone in her body, she is just trying to say keep calm and be patient we will be alright. She, like our Winnie are just trying to voice their own circumstances even though they are good ones.... No different to me jumping on the "I hate flying' topic and trying to tell them about my near fatal plane incident rather than being sympathetic. ..ha ha. X



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[lila22]

My daughter was the hardest baby any of my friends, family had ever known!
She screamed for the first year! I remember my mum saying when you come home (Newcastle) as I was living in Liverpool, we will get her into routine as she had four and my sister was a nightmare! Held her breath! Gate volts out her cot ect!
Well even my mum and dad were like what the heck! They found her hard work, my dad always said she was frustrated and was her personality coming threw!
Anyway my sister had a little boy few years later, she done everything by the book, oh he would sit for hours , never cried ect and I thought god I wish I could of done a good job like that!
Then she had her daughter and the book went out the window!
She got a shock how easy she had it with Sam and how hard it was with Lucy!
So what I'm trying to say is no two kids are the same, I personally don't think it's down to the parent it's the child and there personality.
Ellie (my daughter) is so polite when out. And have often been told this of strangers, but as hormones are now kicking in I don't think she knows how to deal with it! Xx

 

[waffle4]

Hmm just pondering this. My daughter gets severe pmt. Those of you with stroppy teenage daughters are yours getting bad pmt too? If so that would maybe show that it is linked to hormones don't you think?

 

[Victoriabar]

Hmm just pondering this. My daughter gets severe pmt. Those of you with stroppy teenage daughters are yours getting bad pmt too? If so that would maybe show that it is linked to hormones don't you think?

Yes it could be linked, my daughter used to suffer badly and long lasting too. She now has PCOS and still gets PMT but no monthly release.
My 16yro suffers exactly the same as her sister.
They both had first monthlies at 9yrs old for a few months then stopped until 14. I was told once by a doc in great ormond street doing a study on peri menopausal girls that very early periods are often linked with PCOS.
My sisters suffer with their hormones monthly and were hard teens too.. Good linking waffle.

I on the other hand am different.. Late starter, never had pmt or pains or sore boobs, only very light loss for 2 days routinely every 26days, 4 pregnancies they didn't understand how I sustained as my lining was so thin each time, plus I was a very calm teen.
Makes you wonder.

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[lila22]

Hmm just pondering this. My daughter gets severe pmt. Those of you with stroppy teenage daughters are yours getting bad pmt too? If so that would maybe show that it is linked to hormones don't you think?

As soon as I started my periods I changed over night, my mum always reminds me!
I went from a little angel, polite, always helping, always seeing the best in people to angry, frustrate, no one understood me!
I had endermetrosis which was not found out till I was 21 but went threw hell every month.
It's hard being a teenager I guess as they get emotions there not sure how to deal with xx

 

[waffle4]

Well that is certainly food for thought Victoria. I never suffered pmt either (had a hysterectomy at 37) and I was never a stroppy teenager either. I really do think it could maybe be linked. Hmm but what are we supposed to do about it though? I took my daughter to the doctors when she was 13 about her severe pmt and all they said was to go on the pill. She tried it but it never made much difference plus she didn't like the weight gain so came off it pretty quick. I might try getting her some evening primrose oil coz I think that's meant to help hormones/pmt isn't it? Failing that it will be Valium (for me I think!) hahaha x

 

[Victoriabar]

Well that is certainly food for thought Victoria. I never suffered pmt either (had a hysterectomy at 37) and I was never a stroppy teenager either. I really do think it could maybe be linked. Hmm but what are we supposed to do about it though? I took my daughter to the doctors when she was 13 about her severe pmt and all they said was to go on the pill. She tried it but it never made much difference plus she didn't like the weight gain so came off it pretty quick. I might try getting her some evening primrose oil coz I think that's meant to help hormones/pmt isn't it? Failing that it will be Valium (for me I think!) hahaha x

I had hyst at 37 too, not through choice tho. I awoke in intensive care from a section to be told I had 8ltrs of someone else's blood (6initially and 2 next day), hyst and that they lost me during surgery..
Our (at the time) docs told my eldest having a baby would help regulate her hormones.. 7yrs on she had a baby and is poss worse now.
My 16yro was told about the pill and is on it and like your daughter it hasn't made much difference.
Yes EPO is great for is, tesco do their own brand which is quite nicely priced and exact same contents as the more expensive brands.

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[virtues2011]

My daughter complains about a few pains but nothing out of the ordinary. Her nature is flight rather than fight. .. She doesn't really shout so much, slams a few doors, swears continually.... but the laziness, emotionless and "whatever" attitude really just makes my blood boil. I'm convinced the mobile phone issue where it is stuck to her hands 24 hours a day doesn't help! You take it off her and it's like she's possessed! Her head spins at a full 360!



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[mm29]

Iv always been an emotional mess with my hormones, as a teen and still now,
Can't take any contraception doesn't agree with me at all,
Hubby tells me two days before I'm due my periods are coming!! Thanks for that lol

I think it is all related,